Life seems to be going by at a pretty normal pace. Nothing too exciting happening in the near future, besides a river trip. I've have been thinking about my future lately. I'm just going to lay it out.
1. I am going to take the GMAT
2. Further my education and get a MBA
3. Move to New York City or Charlotte
4. Be happy with myself
5. Be proud of what I've accomplished
Five things on my to do list with in the next two years. And the last two are probably the scariest. There is a lot of reasoning behind each of them but I'm most sure more people are wondering why the hell I want to leave Texas or get my MBA so young. Honestly why the hell not? I'm young and moving out of Texas would definitely make me more marketable in the long run for my career and an MBA would just add to that. I know there is only so much you can plan, but I'm determined. If I've learned anything from the past year, it is that you are in charge of your future and every action that leads to that, is completely in your hands.
I'm going to be honest, I haven't been completely happy lately. I think my depression now comes in three month cycles. Who knows. I've started to realize that I suck at maintaining friendships. A big part might because I judge women so much harder than I do men. I hate that people are so unreliable, that people won't tell you the full truth, keep things from you so they won't hurt your feelings, and just being plain shitty. Come on people.
I'm not enjoying single life anymore. I need someone. Someone to hold me. To kiss me. To look into my eyes. To need me. I started dating again, I'm open to to it. Either my expectations are way too high, or I am just having shitty luck. Or I should just stop expecting to find anyone in the next few years. Maybe I really should just focus on me. Me, me, me.
Work is slow but will soon be picking up. I'm sure once things get busy again, I will feel as though I am contributing more and it will result in confidence. Weird how doing good at work makes me more confident.
In the mean time I will stick to thinking about selling all of my belongings, throwing my clothes in a bag, jump on a plane with Teddy and Winston, and go live in NYC.
In the mean time I will focus on loosing weight.
In the mean time I will try and be happy.
In the mean time I will try and forget about men.
In the mean time I will enjoy Texas.
In the mean time I will remind myself how luck I am to be where I am.
In the mean time I will get back to work.......
